Life is change. Growth is optional. Choose wisely.

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

The non-vacation

Visiting family is supposed to be fun, right? Not a chore? Well, for me, it's a chore. At least for 90*% of my family. I like spending time with my mom, and my stepdad's family, my dad, and a couple of my cousins. I dread seeing my aunts and uncles and other grandparents "back home". I used to love spending time with them, but recently, I've noticed that while time has progressed and they've gotten older, they haven't done anything. Their lives haven't improved. They are in the exact same place they were when I was visiting for the summers in middle school and high school. Some are worse off than before. And none of them are even trying to make it better.

It isn't just my family, either. It's the whole area. I'm blogging to you right now using dial-up internet, and it's a rarity that my grandparents even have that. Of course, the people on welfare living in trailers or low-income apartments, driving Cadillacs, have high-speed internet, and run drug rings from their back yards. The whole area is depressing, and depressed. Lots of "closed" signs, and falling-down houses, barns, trailers, and shops. It's very sad.

This so-called vacation is sucking the life out of me, and for the first time in my life, I can't wait to leave. Leave what used to be "home" and is now just another dinky little town in the middle of nowhere. Maybe once my mom and stepdad build their new house, I can come here and not feel so badly. Maybe their home will be my haven and I can vacation here. Maybe having my husband with me would make it easier.

I can hope, right?


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